Ona D: i just saw a commercial for this: http://myalli.com/
Ali:. it sounds like it makes you poop.
Ona D: l isn’t this the same stuff that causes “anal leakage”
Ali: there’s so much stuff out there these days that causes anal leakage
Ona D: it’s amazing everyone doesn’t have brown-stained pants. click on “how alli works in the digestive track” http://myalli.com/howdoesitwork.aspx
Ali: i like the growing pink fatty
Ona D: “treatment effects” – my favorite part - “more frequent stools that may be hard to control”
Ali: i’m viewing it in action right now
Ona D: “gas with oily spotting = anal leakage
Ali: aha! here are the effects
Ona D: aka punishment for eating too much fat
Ali: uncontrollable stools – sweet
Ona D: can’t wait – i would try this thing
Ali: really?
Ona D: “um…*boss*…i can’t come in today… i’m suffering from treatment effects”
Ali: i’d be too afraid i’d splurge one day and shart
Ona D: in a meeting
Ali: “did u just shit?”
“no that’s not shit, that’s just my oily treatment effect”
Ona D: gotta love the “you’re in heaven. relax. don’t think about the possibility of your butt leaking while on a hot date”– music
Ali: i know!!!!!
Ona D: the music is what makes me most suspicious
Ali: i’d be afraid to eat on a date or something. it sounds like it’s brainwashing me
Ona D: “no, no butter – i’m wearing white pants” - yeah, there are subliminal message in the music, “don’t you rather butt leaks vs. love-handles?”
Ali: or just imagine you’re in bed with your man and whoops, sorry that’s just my uncontrollable bowl – but don’t i look skinny?
Ona D: that’s a good way of talking to a guy — look, love my rolls or get a skinny chick who poops during sex
Ali: i bet some guys would think about that
Ona D: true. my fear would be if it caused like, long-term poopiness even after you stopped using it
Ali: if i pooped in bed i’d probably end up crawling underneath it until i felt *boyfriend* had gone far enough away that i cold escape out a window, never to be seen or heard from again
Ona D: can you imagine how many people are going to run to the stores when this comes out? the fact that it’s FDA-approved?
Ali: oh, millions. fat or skinny. and a lot of people are going to think it’s magical and shit themselves because they don’t’ want to diet
Ona D: i wonder if you can like, stop taking it Wednesday if you know you’re gonna pig out Fridayit’s so true. so many ppl will take this and think the anal leakage is a good side effecthow is a person supposed to know if their meal has less than 15 grams of fat?
Ali: labels? so much for eating out. i’d just lose weight cuz i’d fear that if i ate, i’d make a mess of myself
Ona D: exactly. me too. and our blog would come to an oily-assed end
